Fist week of school has come to it's end and I have come to realise many things...
I now understand how little I did to get through last year, especially comparing to what I must do now. I have found out again that the university is all about undergoing the awfully annoying classes and tolerating horrible teachers in order to learn and evolve in the few subjects close to our heart. To apprehend a little more about who we are and what we want to be by the guidance of those so-called maîtres à pensée (maybe not exactly the "cultural heroes" that Limonov claimed extinct, but still a sort of little local gurus for those who appreciate their ideas). Pity for those who haven't found that sort of John Cage-like intellectual guides in the course of their studys. I did and find them most inspiring and motivating. Especially because the majority of lecturers give the reverse effect. This is what makes school tolerable, what makes me go on with more courage. This is why I love all of it so much!
I've also come to understand that, contrairy to the 2nd year, we are being taken very seriously now all of the sudden. As if we'd grown up over the summer. As if this year was a crach course, the ultimate test before letting us jump into the big void called life. And it is kind of scary, hearing teachers call us "future artists" and so on. I don't feel all that grown up at all...
And I'm only starting to realise all the oportunities that lie ahead and how much I've yet to learn. It's almost too much to handle. But time limits and stressful conditions are what make me work best. And I have the feeling that this is what we'll be having non-stop during the whole year. Terrifying but excellent. What more could I ask for!
